Dear Marketing Folks,

After viewing the image you selected for your recent Halloween advertisement, I feel compelled to offer you the following gentle suggestion.

In the future, you may wish to select stock photos less reminiscent of movie posters for The Human Centipede, as these come across less “holiday spooky” and more “help, someone’s sh!tting in my mouth.”

Just a thought to consider.

Sincerely yours,

Alice

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Dear Reader,

Please tell me it’s not just me: 

Thanks, 

Alice